So now that I’m knee deep into wedding planning, i have a better understanding of why a lot of chicks dream about their wedding day from they’re conceived.  Its your day… its your day to shine… those words never really made much sense to me until a few days ago.  Chicks obsess over weddings because its our one day to live like a fucking rock star!!  Live like those celebrities we gawk at in the tabloids and on tv – looking fabulous in an red carpet oscar worthy dress, hair, makeup and nails all did up, and the lights, cameras, and all eyes on noone else but YOU!!! (oh,.. and your man). 

But as I become more and more obsessed, I’m also starting to become more and more depressed.  I’ve haven’t been to a handful of weddings, all very different, but with one major similarity – the brides always look nothing short of drop dead fucking AMAZING.  One of my best friends got married about 2 years ago, and because I was a bridesmaid, I watched her get ready.  She’s one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever known.  Even still, when she walked out with her dress on and bouquet in her hands, my jaw dropped so hardcore it literally dug a 6 foot hole into the ground.  I have chills right now thinking about it.  And to this day, I’ll never forget the reaction on her husband’s face when he saw her for the first time (not during the actual ceremony, but for the pictures beforehand).  My eyes well up with ears every single damn time I think about it. 

Oh, then there’s my other friend who just got married last month.  My experience in seeing her was a bit different because now I myself am engaged.  Gosh, she was stunning.  She’s also one of the prettiest chicks I know , but man… MAN OH MAN!!  I don’t even know what to say, but I’m sure you get the point.  During her entire wedding, when I wasn’t dancing like a drunken maniac, all I could do was think “damn, I’ll never look that good on my day”.  Or any day for that matter!  you know, come to think of it, all of my girl friends are GORG.  My mom – who’s so sweet and supportive but always brutally honest – actually said that she’s worried all of the guests at our wedding will be too busy staring at how pretty all of my bridesmaids are to look at me. 

A couple of weeks ago, when my man got home from work he reported to me what he saw today on his favorite website (see entry below) as per usual.  That day he read a blog about some chick who really really really wanted to do her hair and makeup so that she’ll look like carrie underwood on her wedding day.  she posted a number of pictures to show her readers the look and style she was striving for, and my man says, “I scrolled all the way down thinking yeah sure, why not – until I saw her picture at the end!!!  DAMN!!!”  (that just made my man sound like a shallow jerk, but he’s actually the total opposite, and regardless, that’s not the point of the story so stay with me here!)  anyway, normally I laugh at that sort of thing (because unlike my man, I am a shallow jerk), but that day I didn’t even so much as crack a wack smile.  I guess maybe because no less than a few days before that, I had printed out about 20 pictures of Jessica alba hoping that I might look like her on my wedding day.  And no, I won’t be posting any pictures (although if I did maybe people would actually read my blogs). 

So I decided instead to focus on something that I can make look good… and now I’m totally obsessing over decorations.  One of my guilty pleasures is watching the tv show Platinum Weddings.  It showcases weddings that are completely over the top and as they always say “have spared no expense”.  My man HATES this show with the deepest burning passion.  I mean, I hate it too, but its so interesting (and extremely annoying) how people choose to style their weddings when money is not a barrier.  Are all rich people tacky and unoriginal??  I suppose I shouldn’t really judge… especially considering how brizzzzzoke my man and I are.  But also because I can’t seem to come up with anything creative or stylish for our wedding décor and I’m not even taking into account cost at this point.  I’m inspired by a lot of beautiful things that I see on wedding websites (particularly my friend’s – blog.mika78.com), but none of them seem to represent my man and I as a couple.  I know that weddings don’t have to have a theme, but its important to me that on our wedding day, my man and I showcase to our loved ones who we are as a couple in every little detail, from the food and music to the color scheme and favors.  After all, its our day to shine, isn’t it?

wow, i would like to say to myself – welcome back!

it has been quite a long ass time since i’ve written an entry on xanga.  acutally, it took me about 10 mins just to figure out where the button for making a new entry is.  judging by my last entry, its been a lot longer than i thought.  so much has changed since then.  the last time i wrote an entry, i was a crass, self-deprecating chick who couldn’t get a man to save her soul.  and this was such commong knowledge to everyone that it was practically a fact of life.  you could bet your life on it.  it’s like saying a lemon is sour.  doesn’t mean that its bad, just means that thats what it is – its sour.  that’s what my guy friend was saying.  i’m not a hot chick, therefore i don’t go to a bar where hot chicks go.  i just go to bars where my guy friends who like to wear jeans and kicks and get drunk and sweaty and bang on tables like to go. 

well you know what?!  this not so hot chick is now engaged beeeeee-yotch!  hell yeah!  I GOT A MAN so what yo’ no jeans and kicks kinda man gotta do with me!

i have to say though, being engaged sucks.  not only am i not a hot chick, i’m a i don’t like to be engaged and plan my wedding type of chick too.  the idea of being forever with my mayn, well thats pretty damn cool.  i mean, sometimes i’m like, oh geez, is THAT what its going to be like forever???  and ever???  but other than those few moments, i’m mostly pretty excited.  we have a lot of fun together – just not when we’re planning our damn wedding.  just to give you an idea of the type of chick that i am (if you still weren’t quite so sure yet) and the type of dude my mayn is:  i’ve been on weddingbee.com ONCE and that was only because i was feeling doubtful about the venue i was about to sign with and wanted to see what kind of rep it had with all the brides out there, but couldn’t find anyone who had gotten married at that venue.  the only bit of information i was able to find was on weddingbee.com – some bride-to-be was talking about how she was regretful about signing with that venue.  so i registered just so i could get her opinion.  my mayn, on the other hand, is on weddingbee.com EVERYDAY.  you know how some people just say logged into facebook or xanga or gmail all day (or obesessively log in and out like every other minute to see what new updates there are?) – that is precisely my mayn on weddingbee.  i guess i can’t complain.  its like having a sentinel to do my recon for me, except most of the cool ideas that he sees on weddingbee we simply cannot do because i’m either too lazy, or we’re just too damn poor.  but he did say something really sweet yesterday. 

he said,
“hunny… you don’t have to feel like you’re all alone in being stressed out about the wedding.”

so i said,
“oh really?  why?  what are you stressed about?”

he replied,
“oh, not me.  i mean the bee community.  a lot of other brides out there are stressed out too.”

and then he proceeded to tell me about how some chick was stressed out about how she thought her fiance was cheating on her and her wedding was only 3 months away.  you know what then?  woman, you need to git yo’self a new mayn!  i didn’t say that (although i was thinking it).  i just told my mayn, that i still think i have it worse.

anyway, i called in sick from work today because its raining and because i really need to study for a test that i have on monday, but haven’t done jack yet so its time for me to sign off.  plus, i don’t really have much else to say about wedding planning.  oh wait, i do!  IT SUCKS!  just kidding.  actually, i need a quick bit of advice.  since all of my bridesmaids are wearing different style dresses (although same fabric and same shade of color), i’m thinking about getting them all the same shoes to wear.  i guess i just don’t know if they’ll like them, because the shoes are totally my taste (fuscia and orange snake skin strappy heels beyotch!).  what do you think, should i get them the shoes?  please do not comment on the shoe style because honestly, i like them and could care less what you think.  i only want to know if it would be okay to get them all shoes.

alright, i’m going for real now.
have a nice weekend!

man, i sooooo just got dissed big time .


me: we’re trying to think of a place for a party
guy friend: hmm
guy friend: this is a little last minute
me: hahah
me: theres’ aplace we went to for halloween
me: im thinking maybe we shuld ujust go back there
guy friend: where’s that
guy friend: my friend just had her party at r-bar
guy friend: said it was fun
me: that korean place??
guy friend: no
guy friend: american
guy friend: on bowery
guy friend: and spring.. i want to say
guy friend: used to be the old pioneer
me: i have no idea
me: im a loser and dont know cool places
guy friend: i just live vicariously through others who do go out
me: i dont even do that
me: we want to go tot a ghetto place
me: where we can wear jeans and snekaers
me: but a place that has hot chicks
me: cuz my guy friends wnat hot chicks
guy friend: lol
guy friend: uh
guy friend: jeans sneakers and hot chicks dont go together
guy friend: a bar that will let you wear jeans and sneakers wont be frequeneted by hot chicks
guy friend: the chicks there will be coming with guys who wanted to wear jeans and sneakers
me: HAHHAHAHA
me: WAIT
me: thats me =(

FYI, i only have a few tix left for the boxing event on the 18th, so i you haven’t talked to me about tix yet, i need confirmations by next tuesday.

—————-

By ANNE MARIE CHAKER of Wall Street Journal at anne-marie.chaker@wsj.com
October 11, 2007

A law President Bush signed last month drew a lot of attention for trying to make college more affordable for many. Less trumpeted were provisions that support the altruists among us.

The law, signed by President Bush last month, appropriates $20 billion to cut interest rates on certain federal student loans and increase grant aid for low-income students over the next five years. But the College Cost Reduction and Access Act also creates an important incentive for all students to enter fields of public service by offering to forgive what could amount to tens of thousands of dollars of school debt per student.

 
New legislation aims to lure more graduates to public service.
• Students can have federal debt forgiven after 10 years in public-service work.
• Qualifying jobs range from public health to law enforcement and public-interest law.
• Conditions apply, so check with your financial-aid office or get information at www.finaid.org.

The legislation broadly defines public service to include a wide range of occupations, such as public health, public education, working for a nonprofit organization and serving in law enforcement or as a public-interest lawyer. The Education Department says it expects to issue guidance to clarify exactly which professions will qualify.

Here’s how the Public Service Loan Forgiveness program will work: For people working in public service, the balance of a student loan is forgiven after 120 monthly payments, equal to 10 years. Let’s say a single borrower graduates with $100,000 in student debt and gets a public-service job that pays $40,000 a year with annual raises of 3%. Because of the relatively low salary, the borrower would qualify for a newly created program known as Income Based Repayment, which stretches out the repayment period beyond the usual 10 years. Monthly repayments for this graduate would be between $309 and $403. After 10 years, the individual has repaid $42,448, and is forgiven the balance of $125,552, assuming interest of 6.8%, the current rate for federal Stafford loans.

In order to qualify for the program, your loans must come under the federal Direct Loan program. If you borrowed from banks and other commercial lenders for your federal student loans, you can still qualify for the program by consolidating them through the Direct Loan program. Some colleges offer direct federal loans, while others work through commercial lenders only. Your college financial-aid office should have more information on the program. Or you can check FinAid.org, which offers financial-aid information and has a page at: www.finaid.org/loans/publicservice.phtml.

Other professional groups also are expecting heightened interest in public-service work. “We have low salaries and a very high debt burden,” says Rebecca Myers, special assistant to the executive director at the National Association of Social Workers. “We’re really glad to see that there’s some movement on this, and we believe it will help social workers.”

For medical-school graduates, who carry an average $130,000 of debt, the provision could save up to $75,000 in student-loan payments by working in public service for at least 10 years, according to the Association of American Medical Colleges. The group says it is seeking clarification on which specific types of jobs qualify as “public health” workers under the terms of the new provision.

Some caveats: Federal law treats the amount of any debt forgiven as taxable income. Also, if a borrower gets married, the couple’s combined income is counted toward calculating monthly payments, and the borrower might not qualify for Income Based Repayment.

The law also helps needy students who receive Pell Grants. The maximum amount that students can currently receive is $4,310. That gets increased to $4,800 by next year, then to $5,000 starting in 2010, and then to $5,400 by 2012.

However, to offset the cost of the additional spending, the government has reduced payments to banks and other lenders who, acting as middlemen, issue the federal loans to students. These lenders in turn have begun scaling back a host of discounts they had previously offered students amid competition for borrowers.

The law also makes some improvements in the federal formula that schools use to determine aid. It doubles the amount of a dependent student’s earnings that are sheltered to $6,000 by 2012-13 from $3,080 for 2008-09. It also raises the income threshold below which a family isn’t expected to contribute to college to $30,000 from the current $20,000.

i need to confirm tix by this week, so if you want to come and watch a 99 lbs chick kick my ass on the 18th let me know.  tix are $20 each.

btw, thats my sister screaming not me .  i’m much more obnoxious .

4 seconds ko biaaaaaatchhh!

—————————-

“danny yu” is supposed to be david you hahhaa

http://www.combatinthecage.com/amfightcard.htm#2

see you at the fight !!!

** after party at crime scene (310 Bowery, NYC) **

i’m an auntie!




logan john park 9/11/07
8.5 lbs, 21.25 inches

this saturday, 9/15 @ 7:30pm
extreme challenge “rumble in rahway” presents:

daaaaave the caveman youuuuuu !!!!


tix are $30 for general admission, $45 for ringside
if you want tix, i need money by this thursday, 9/13
email me at cjieunlee@gmail.com


doors open at 6:30pm, seats are first come first serve
fight will be held at the Rahway Recreational Center in Rahway, NJ

if you live in nyc, or commute into nyc, please fill this out !!!!

http://enterprise.mtanyct.info/survey/english/lineSelect.asp



i don’t work for the mta, i just like complaining about it!